The Victors

I guess we had a 10th although I didn't go and wasn't aware. 20th got nixed b/c of COVID.

I remember Randy had a theory the 20th was good to go to b/c the 10th everyone is still young and by the 30th everyone is old anyway, but the 20th is a good time where you start to see separation from who has really let themselves go, which I suppose is one way to look at it. Maybe a little dark/bad, but one of those things that, if we're being honest, you kind of want to know.

My wife expressed a willingness to go, which is...odd, to me. She knows a few of my friends who would otherwise go, and she insisted I make sure they're going and then she'll go. Which is fine, but I just feel like it'd be really awkward being at someone else's reunion, since you don't know most of the people, you definitely don't know most of what they're reminiscing about, and, like dreams, it's one of those areas where the stories are really only interesting to the people actually involved most of the time.

It's too bad Facebook and the like exists so people sort of have some idea of what you've been up. I think it'd be fun in a sociopathic sort of way to just create a completely false background. You're never going to see these people again, or if you do, they won't remember, so just make up whatever. I had a sex change, became a famous exotic dancer in Thailand, then changed back. Ok, maybe a little more grounded in reality.

The one thing that makes me a little apprehensive is that while my self-image of myself is that I am and was smart and kind and all of that, any time I actually remember or am reminded of myself in HS, it's usually me doing something incredibly stupid or being an obnoxious piece of shit. Which, I probably was still much better than median, teenagers do a lot of dumb and shitty things, and I don't think most people carry that around as baggage to lay on people 20 years later ("remember when you cheated on me?")(not that I did that), but there's at least 1 or 2 people I, among others, were kind of dicks to, and if they showed up and felt the need to bring it up, I'd be hard-pressed not to say they were right. I don't think anyone does that, though, and I probably wasn't so bad to anyone that I'd stand out as a lingering source of psychic damage.

OTOH, the one lingering thing that stands out as a memorable HS story that involves me (albeit tangentially) is when my girlfriend cheated on me on prom night with another one of my friends. I suppose I could make life awkward for everyone else if I really wanted to relive that one, but I think we're all happier if I don't.